Stop Should-ing on Yourself and Other Strategies to Stop Limiting Your Happiness

Have you ever felt weighed down by the 'shoulds', 'woulds' and 'coulds' of life?

Join me, Dai Manuel, as we break free from these invisible chains, transforming anxiety and hesitation into action and fulfillment. 

This episode is not just another pep talk; it's a hands-on guide to reshaping your internal dialogue. 

We'll untangle the hidden pressures of living by someone else's rulebook and reveal how swapping 'should' with 'I choose' can significantly ease the burden of expectations. 

It's about taking back control and living authentically, one empowering phrase at a time.

Together, we'll confront the fears that whisper 'would' and 'could' in our ears, preventing us from diving into new experiences and opportunities. 

By replacing regret with present-focused empowerment, we'll explore how to craft a personal narrative that champions 'I am,' 'I choose,' and 'I will.' 

This is your invitation to a lighter, more purposeful path forward. 

So tune in, lighten your load, and move 2% closer to the life you've always aspired to lead.

Transcript

Dai Manuel: 0:06

Hey everyone, welcome back to the 2% solution, where we explore small changes that hugely impact our lives. I'm Diamond Wall, your host on this journey to breaking free from the change we've put on ourselves, and today we're tackling a big one the tyranny of should, would and could. You know what I'm talking about. Most times you tell yourself I should be doing more. I would try that if I were braver or I could have been somewhere else in my life by now, let's dive into why these statements are more than just harmless self-talk and how they're actually holding you back, and, of course, we'll cover how to shift your mindset for the better. So let's start with the weight of should First.

Dai Manuel: 0:53

This little word carries a ton of weight. It's often a sign that we're living by someone else's standards or expectations, not our. When we say I should, we usually talk about obligations we might not even believe in or care about. It's like carrying a backpack with bricks labeled with everything we think we should do. Here's something you might not know Research suggests that using should too frequently can increase feelings of anxiety and depression. It sets us up for failure because we aim for standards that aren't aligned with our true desires or values. So every I should is like adding another brick to the backpack. Next, discuss would I would do this? But oh, that dreaded. But it's hesitation's best friend. When we use would, we often desire to do something, but let fear or uncertainty stop us. It's like standing at the edge of a diving board, wanting to jump but not doing it. But here's a kick. Studies show that taking calculated risks and stepping out of our comfort zones can lead to significant personal growth and satisfaction. Yeah, it's scary, but the regret of not trying can weigh heavier on us than the fear of failure. So when you catch yourself saying, I would ask what's really stopping me?

Dai Manuel: 2:23

Lastly, let's tackle could. This one's all about missed opportunities and looking back with regret. I could have been or I could have done. It's easy to look back and imagine a different life if we had made a different choice. But here's the thing Dwelling on what could have been doesn't change where we are now. A study found that ruminating on past decision increases feelings of dissatisfaction and can ultimately hinder our ability to make positive choices present. So maybe we should start talking about how do we shift the narrative, how do we shift away from should of, would, of, could, of?

Dai Manuel: 3:03

Here are a few actionable steps to help. Number one is awareness. Start by noticing when you use these words. This is the first step to change. Second, reframing Instead of I should try, I choose to. This small yet subtle change can empower you to take actions that align with your values.

Dai Manuel: 3:26

Number three it's all about face and fears. When I would pops up, challenge yourself to face the fear or obstacle. What's the worst that could happen and how can you prepare for it? And number four focus on now. Place I could have with I can now Focus on what you can do in the present to shape your future. Remember, friends, you control your narrative. By changing the way you talk to yourself, you can change the way you experience life. Let's drop the weight of should, move past the hesitation of would and stop dwelling on the regret of could. It's time to live in the empowering world of. I am, I choose and I will. Thanks for turning it into this episode of 2% solution. As I said, I'm dying and well, reminding you that you can change your life 2% at a time. And until next time, keep pushing forward, choose and joy, and remember you got this.