How to Tell if You Are an ASKhole (and what to do if you are)

Have you ever been caught in the endless loop of seeking advice without taking it?

That's the story of my own 'askhole' journey, which I share openly in today's Mental Health Monday. It's a candid look at the irony of craving guidance yet resisting the very changes that could transform our lives. 

We've all been there, either doling out pearls of wisdom that fall on deaf ears or being the one who hoards advice like a squirrel with acorns but never feasting on the knowledge. 

This episode is your wake-up call, a friendly yet firm push towards actionable change. I unpack the psychology behind our 'askhole' tendencies and, more importantly, provide four transformative steps to break the cycle: commit to implementation, reflect on feedback, express gratitude, and be open to change. 

So, tune in if you're ready to shift from validation-seeker to action-taker or know someone who could use a nudge in the right direction. 

Let's embark on this journey together towards improvement, focusing on growing just 2% each day, and remember to share your strides in the reviews. 

Stay positive, Wellness Warriors, and keep acting on your best advice!

Transcript

Dai Manuel: 0:07

Hello Wellness Warriors and welcome back to another Mental Health Monday on the 2% Solution. I'm your host, diamond Well, here to help you start your week with clarity and positivity, and today we're diving into a lighthearted and insightful topic. You may be an askhole if Yep, you heard me right An askhole. Have you ever heard of that term before? Now, being an askhole is a bit of an ironic situation. It's someone who asks for advice but never follows it. You know the type. They seek guidance constantly, yet always return to their old ways and, let's be fair, it takes one to know one. We've all been there either on the giving or the receiving end of this frustrating cycle. Let me share a story about how I learned this concept firsthand. Let me share a story about how I learned this concept firsthand.

Dai Manuel: 1:27

Many, many, many, many, many, many years ago, I used to frequently ask for advice, asking them for tips and strategies on fitness routines or time management, yet I didn't fully apply what they often would tell me. Now, why is that? Because I wasn't truly ready to make the change. I wasn't committed. I just wanted to know what to do without putting in the work. But don't just take my word for it.

Dai Manuel: 1:49

A study from the University of Chicago found that people often seek advice to reaffirm their beliefs rather than genuinely change. That's human nature we're drawn to validation and reassurance, but it takes conscious effort to step away from being an asshole and into someone who acts. So how can you tell if you, or maybe someone you know, is acting like an asshole? Well, here are some telltale signs you always ask for advice on the same thing, but never seem to act on it. Or you're looking for guidance, guidance, but not open to views that challenge your own. And number three, you ask for opinions but don't bother to follow up or even thank the person who helped you with their time and effort. This habit can frustrate those seeking and providing advice. It can also be emotionally draining and often results in feelings of helplessness. However, this is not a life sentence, because by recognizing this pattern, we can begin to make the changes. So how do we avoid being an askle and move toward positive, actionable change? Well, let me tell you.

Dai Manuel: 3:04

Number one commit to implementation Next time you ask for advice. Commit to trying at least one suggestion consistently for a few weeks before seeking more input. It's about building that momentum. Number two reflect on feedback Instead of seeking constant validation. Reflect on the advice you've received and understand how it aligns with your goals. Number three express gratitude. Always show your appreciation for those who take the time to offer guidance. Let them know how their advice has impacted you.

Dai Manuel: 3:41

Number four be willing to change. This is the most important part. Be open to changing your mindset and actions based on new perspectives. So, whether you're an asshole in recovery or just recognizing this pattern, you know you can break free. It's about being willing to embrace change and act on it. After all, growth starts with listening but thrives with action. If today's episode has resonated with you, share it with someone who might need a little nudge, or leave a review to let me know how you're embracing the change. As of late, I'm here to help Help you Improve just 2% each day. And I gotta say thank you for tuning in to Mental Health Monday on the 2% each day. And I got to say thank you for tuning in to Mental Health Monday on the 2% Solution. Until next time, stay positive, stay committed and, as always, keep acting on your best advice. I'll see you next time.